Karma

Some more things that I have been holding in that my closest and oldest friend dropped the biggest bomb on me. Her ex boyfriend called her because he wanna to discuss that was bothering him.. A guy that I had been / was / is in this off and on relationship for about 5 to 6 yrs now was telling all his brothers and friends that I call him all the time and that I randomly drive 4+ hrs to drive to visit him on my own.. he must have got our phone lines crossed because he's all saying come visit him.. this man has actually told me that he loves me.. but I have to remember how we started out.. it was a college fling.. meeting behind less crowed buildings, going off campus, the sneaking was a lot easier to deal with.. it just hurts because I try to give him his space but its still not working.. now with this one I think its really time to hand him a pink slip to exit my life.. Love is a lot of things but it couldn't be like this.. I cant be the girl that you wanna be with on your own terms.. I know that one day I'm gonna find a guy thats gonna love me when were alone and when were with his friends..